Falling in love can be dangerous

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What will you do if you caught your bae cheating on you? How would you react? Would you go crazy, smash his stuffs on the floor or you will just go away quietly like a friend of mine once said she would?”

He cheated on me. My name is Chinyere, and I am 23 years old. I have been dating Toby for fourteen months now. But what he put me through today, I doubt if I can ever recover from it. Perhaps, I can, but hear me out first.

It was a very sunny Friday. At least that was how I had planned to narrate the story. However, now I can only say it was a Friday but the part of being sunny, I can’t say for sure. What I went through that Friday made it the darkest day of my life. When I mean dark, I mean both figuratively and literally.

So here was I that morning in front of my mirror, admiring the shape of my waist and making some funny comparison of it with that of Kim Kardashian. I could picture Toby holding me by the waist. I could picture him drawing his face closer to my lips. That moment I had closed my eyes, waiting for his invisible lips to intersect with mine.

But the voice of Oghale, my roommate, soon woke me up from the day-dream. It was too late, just that picture of him in my head had made me wet. That moment I couldn’t wait for 4pm to come. 6 hours’ time was like all the years I had spent in school. By this I mean primary, secondary and my first two years’ in this party ground they call a university. I was that anxious to meet Toby for the room-date. He had told me of all his plans. Plans to light up his room with red and blue candles and all sorts of colours I can never imagine. He also told me he would prepare me a meal. Just this morning, I was already salivating so deeply and anticipating his meal that I didn’t even eat the oat Oghale had taken her time to make for us. I was waiting for that of Toby. Maybe more than just the meal, maybe I was waiting to have that feel of the softness of his lips too. That was only what I felt like eating at the time – his food or his lips.

But here am I now. I have lost appetite. No amount or quality of food can ever regain that appetite for me. I would starve myself to death. If that doesn’t work, I might consider the homophone and stab myself. But whichever way, I want to leave this world. Wicked world as it was already, but Toby even made it more miserable for me.

I wish he told me from the start. I wish he told me all he wanted was just someone to satisfy his urge and not really because he wanted to be in love. He claims he loves me though, but I think I have been foolish all along. If my folly were to be a fruit, by now it would have been matured enough to be plucked.

Sitting here with just my pen and book is the only thing I can do. After this, I’m gonna take my life. And if you think I’m overreacting, then wait till you hear the story for yourself and then you can be the judge.

So after I was done admiring my supposed beautiful shape, I decided to take my bath. That was after Oghale had screamed “Mr. Otobo” loudly in my left ear. The sound of that man’s name could make any physics student recover from coma. I then rushed to the bathroom to have my bath seeing that I was already running late for his lectures.

However, being that I knew I was ready to offer my body to Toby tonight, I had to admire it a little. I bent down to see if I could take that last look at my hymen, at least before it goes into oblivion. I touched my nipple, made a funny sound and could already picture his lips on it for tonight. The picture of that in my head alone made me to moan loudly. I was set for tonight.

“Mr. Otobo!” came the loud voice of Oghale once more. That was when it dawned on me that I had already spent over thirty minutes in the bathroom admiring myself and preparing it as a living sacrifice for Toby. This is the day I will be deflowered. It was like a dream-come-through for me. I had waited so long to give it to the one I love. Toby has proved beyond every reasonable doubt that he would be the one for me.

Finally I am out of the bathroom. “Toby is preparing a meal for me joor. Eat your oat alone” I had said to Oghale with every bit of naughtiness I could muster out of me. With the look she gave me, I could read her response like pages of Chinua Achebe’s Things fall apart. She already meant she wouldn’t cook for me again. Since things had already fallen apart, I gave her that look back with a teasing face and said “Ehen, can’t I cook myself again. Abeggi joor.” Then I laughed so loud that tears almost fell off her eyes.

I was in love, you can’t blame me please. Maybe you have never fallen in love, that’s why you are blaming me. So that being said, we both went to class. It was just a one-hour class, but was long to me as the distances covered by the athletes in the Lagos City Marathon that holds yearly in Nigeria. Finally it was 4pm. The same Oghale that I have teased so much to tears earlier this morning was the same person who helped dressed me up. “Aren’t you this lovely Oghale?” I said, since my conscience was judging me without Messi. Sorry Mercy I mean.

Long story cut short: here was I. Standing in the front of my hostel waiting for Toby to come pick me. We had agreed 4:15pm. “Why this delay naa” I had thought in my heart. This was already about 5pm. Being that I knew Toby to have always been a gentleman, this was unlike him to keep me waiting. “Perhaps, he is still busy with the candles or the cooking,” I said trying to console myself. Since Oghale had gone to the library immediately after she dressed me up, I knew I couldn’t wait any longer. I was bored. I then took a cab and in seven minutes, I was in his hostel.

 

Why this delay naa?

 

From the atmosphere around, I felt something was wrong. I could hear a very loud music coming from Toby’s room. I could easily conclude it was his room, since he was playing our best song by Edsherran. At least I recognized it with the lyrics I heard – “We were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was…” It was a perfect representation of our story. “What a time to give him my honour” I thought.

Smiling with my eyes almost popping out to withstand the degree of the blush I had, I opened his door expecting that “wao” kind of feeling. I was expecting the red and blue candles on the shelf and the petals sprinkled all over the bed. I was expecting the aroma coming from his food to take me off my feet like that Gino Tomato advert I was used to seeing as a kid.

Of course I saw all I expected. However, there was something I saw which I never expected. I wish I never saw it. I saw two people on the bed. I saw two people lying down on my red petals that were sprinkled. I saw them, oblivious of my presence as they were in deep romance. Worst of it all, our song – my song, it kept on playing as the male in the picture kept on thrusting his waist back and forth on the lady’s.

The guy was my Toby. The lady was my Oghale. Please give me one reason why I should not commit suicide. Or at least commit murder. Just one reason!

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